She was wild and free
Always running around in the world of make believe
He wanted to keep her for himself
But that kind of spirit couldn’t be caged
She wilted behind the bars he built
A shadow of the girl she once was
She needs the wind in her hair and the ocean salts on her skin
She broke free and spread her wings
And she soared
The seconds turned into minuets and the minuets into hours
And I still longed for the light to fade
The dark was my home, my safe place from the eyes
There was no-one but the moon to confide in
And the mask could be removed
It’s tiring to hide the shadows in the light
The darkness set them free to roam
And with that I could breath
For I no longer had to pretend
It was just me, the shadows and the demons now
The Ocean and the Shore
The Moon and the Sun
The boy and the girl
The kind of love that for-sees the greatest sacrifices and still manages to prevail.
The ocean will always find it’s way back to the shore despite constantly being pushed away. An unapologetic support that it will always be there even when you keep being pushed away.
The moon will always set to enable the sun to shine in his absence. He would take the dark with him to allow her to shine with no obstacles. He would sacrifice himself to let her flourish. A bittersweet heartbreak.
And then there’s him and her. She looked at him like he hung the moon and he looked at her like she put the stars in the sky. They lived in the dark yet gave each other light to find their way. The kind that defies logic and brings the lost souls together. Bringing the light into the darkest of nights. An unexpected love.
You’ve got those big blues staring at me
I feel so exposed when your gaze is focused on me
My soul is bare to all that is you
It cannot hide from another that speaks the same
No need to be scared
Your not alone in the hurricane anymore
Spread your wings and fly among the chaos
The darkness doesn’t have to be so dark
Watch the stars shine
Let them light the way
You don’t have to be afraid
You will find the light again
The little bird sits in it’s nest waiting for it’s mother to feed him. All big eyes and fluffy feathers. Unable to move more than a couple of inches in fear of falling from the nest so high in the sky. Then one day the little bird just decides he’s ready, ready to leave it’s home and see what else is out there in the big beyond. He climbs to the edge and just steps off. He’s never practised before, doesn’t know if he will fall to the ground or soar above the trees. He doesn’t let the fear take over, it’s just instinct so ingrained in his DNA that fear is not an emotion that he can comprehend. He just steps out. The little bird spreads his wings and lets instinct take over and he soars above it all. He leaves the nest behind and sets upon a new adventure, a new life.
We as humans can learn a lot from these beautiful creatures. We’ve let ourselves believe that fear is a common feeling, something that we use as an excuse to prevent us from stepping off the ledge. Fear shouldn’t be an excuse, it shouldn’t even be a word in our vocabulary. Let’s learn from the little bird, let’s let instinct take over. If we listened to our inner selves more we might even find freedom on the other side of ‘fear’.
Loneliness – a word so powerful that I believe its impossible to give it only one defining meaning.
There’s the physical type of loneliness where your sat in a room on your own wishing for someone to come and join you. When your wandering the streets striving for the carefree interactions you witness all around you.
There’s the emotional kind – the type ‘they’ write quotes about. Where your standing in the middle of a crowded room feeling like no-one understands you. The type that your mind tries to decipher to understand before the tears start to fall. Your mind building walls to protect you that are inadvertently pushing other people away.
Then there’s the type of loneliness that burrows itself into the soul. The type that has no signs until its worked its way so deep inside you there is no way of letting it go. All you crave is to find another pair of eyes that speak and understand the hurricane within. Someone who might even have the same storm brewing inside of them. The same storm that hits when you realise saying ‘I’m fine’ has no meaning anymore. That there the only words you can bring yourself to say, unaware of the damage they are causing until you don’t see the sun in sight anymore. The darkness has swallowed you whole and now you need to find a way to build a home in the dark.
What most people don’t realise however is that you may live in the dark but it doesn’t mean your life sees nothing of value. There’s a different kind of beauty found in the dark. The stars shine that much brighter here. The darkness sets out a different path and after a while your eyes learn how to adjust. It forces you to look within to become so in tune with yourself, to know your wants and beliefs that soon your not so desperate to hand yourself over to someone else. You understand now that you are enough to create your own happiness.
I’m a 26-year-old semi-fake blonde living in Ho Chi Minh City. Originally from England now living and working in Vietnam. I may be on the ‘typical’ expat path but I need a chance to live a life I have more control over rather than living in hiding. All I’m trying to do is find a place for myself in a world that is always trying to make people into things they are not. But first I need to discover who I am…